Trying to tackle myself for EXACTLY NO REASON.

I'm afraid of so many things.

1) I'm afraid that I won't be able to take care of myself and settle down even after the passing of my parents. (knock wood)

2) I'm afraid that I won't be able to take my degree.

3) I'm afraid to fall in love, because it hurts every time they leave, when they say they don't love you anymore, when they are no longer interested in you and lay eyes on someone else, or when the magic between two people doesn't work anymore.

4) I'm afraid all the people that I proudly call my friends are only impostors in a mask of familiarity.

5) I'm afraid to accept the fact that my dog will someday die, therefore my love for her decreases every day. She's such a loyal dog with a heartless owner... Sorry Sabby, I just can't deal with losing something precious... But I do love you very much. :(

6) I'm afraid that someday I might look and shape JUST LIKE my mom.

7) I'm afraid that I might be married to another version of my dad.

8) I'm afraid I might not be able to conceive.

9) I'm afraid the day someone proposes to me will never come.

10) I'm afraid that I'll have to spend all my future weekends with no friends and lover, spending all my weekdays as a workaholic, and my closest lover would only be blue film and cigarettes whilst my friends would only be nothing but thick self-motivating books.

11) I'm afraid the person that I love now won't love me anymore in the future. I don't want to be replaced. :(

12) I'm afraid of death. I don't want to be eaten by maggots.

13) I'm afraid I'd still be religion-less when I'm in my death bed. :/

14) I'm afraid that someday I'd go broke.

15) I'm afraid to go on this road alone.

16) I'm afraid of being too soft or being too hard... People would be freaking mad at you or would only take advantage of you.

17) I'm afraid that I might inherit my mother and grandmother's ovarian cancer.

18) I'm afraid of ghosts. I don't want to think that one is actually looking at me write all this right now. :/ *creepy*

19) I'm afraid to even continue living, but I'm also afraid of dying.

20) I'm afraid that all of these things that I'm afraid of will eventually be the cause for my fall and will somehow cause me to be more afraid to the psychotic level. Hopefully not.

Oh dear God, just show me some signs. Like an I-Phone falling from my roof. Guess not. Sigh. That's all for tonight. :(